Crossing Over: One Woman's Escape from Amish Life

by Ruth Irene Garrett, Rick Farrant | Biographies & Memoirs |
ISBN: 006052992x Global Overview for this book
Registered by classicfox on 5/5/2007
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14 journalers for this copy...
Journal Entry 1 by classicfox on Saturday, May 5, 2007
"Ruth Irene Garrett was the fifth of seven children raised in Kalona, Iowa as a member of a strict Old Order Amish community. She was brought up with rigid rules and intense secrecy in a world where the dress, buggies, codes of conduct, and way of life differed from that of other Amish societies a mere one hundred miles away. Her community uncompomisingly avoided all interaction with 'the English'--everyone who lived on the outside. As a result, Ruth knew only one way of life, one way of doing things.
This compelling true tale offers a striking look inside a hidden community as a woman comes to terms with her discontent and ultimately leaves her family, faith, and the sheltered world of her childhood..."

Journal Entry 2 by classicfox on Tuesday, March 9, 2010
3/9/10: Reading now -
Offering up as a bookray

Journal Entry 3 by classicfox on Tuesday, March 23, 2010
~BOOKRAY~

Mailing order:

1. kerbam1421
2. dabercro
3. dg7500
4. poobah1 --wanted to be put last
5. oi-reader (many thanks for mailing overseas)
6. Icila
7. sing-on-a-star
8. azuki
9. 300dogs
10. spoiledrotten
11. collectorkerri
12. WeHomeschool
13. guinaveve
14. Aberpeter
15. sarkiegirl
16. poobah1

1/15/11: I have turned this into a ray so last on list may keep it.

Usual rules apply:
Please keep book no longer than one month.
PM next on list when you receive the book.
Please make journal entries.
Enjoy!!


Journal Entry 4 by classicfox at Controlled Release, A Bookcrossing member -- Controlled Releases on Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Released 14 yrs ago (3/24/2010 UTC) at Controlled Release, A Bookcrossing member -- Controlled Releases

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Winging its way to first on the list, kerbam1421. Hope you enjoy!

Journal Entry 5 by kerbam1421 from Halethorpe, Maryland USA on Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Received this last night and am looking forward to reading it! I have 2 books in front of it. Thanks for including me! :)

UPDATE: Began reading on 4/13/2010

Journal Entry 6 by kerbam1421 from Halethorpe, Maryland USA on Friday, April 16, 2010
Thank you for sharing this book with me! Although I would have liked to read some more details from Irene's earlier life, it was encouraging to read about her courage to leave her family, friends, and community behind. I was a little bit appalled by the age of Ottie, but I guess love is blind....

I will get this book out early next week. Thank you again!!!

Journal Entry 7 by kerbam1421 at Landover, Maryland USA on Monday, April 19, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (4/19/2010 UTC) at Landover, Maryland USA

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Off to dabercro! Enjoy! :)

DC#: 420840159102150134711127387247

Journal Entry 8 by dabercro from Clinton, Utah USA on Sunday, April 25, 2010
Received in the mail yesterday. It will be my next read. Looks good.

Journal Entry 9 by dabercro from Clinton, Utah USA on Sunday, May 2, 2010
I applaud Irene for her courage to follow her heart and instincts and leave her Amish community. She did even say that she felt that her religion was a "cult". I was disappointed, though, that she didn't go into much detail about her Amish upbringing. She also mentions her father's "abuse" but with no details at all. I have over the past few months read a few books about other women escaping from abusive situations, all in the name of religion, and their stories went into much more detail. I was hoping for the same from this book. I don't feel that I have any more insight into the Amish religion or way of life than I had before reading this book.

Journal Entry 10 by dabercro at -- BookRing, -- By post or by hand/ in person -- USA on Monday, May 3, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (5/3/2010 UTC) at -- BookRing, -- By post or by hand/ in person -- USA

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Sending to the next participant, dg7500, in PA.

Journal Entry 11 by wingdg7500wing from Lancaster, Pennsylvania USA on Friday, May 7, 2010
Arrived safely. I need to finish another before starting on this, but hope to get to it within a few days.

Update 5/15/10: 'SPOILERS' included, so don't continue further if you're not wanting details of the books contents before reading it yourself.

Well, this wasn't quite what I expected, and I really have mixed feelings about the book. I'm born & raised in Lancaster County...heart of the PA Dutch/Amish community...and have family roots in the Amish/Mennonite/Brethren communities. I applaude the author's strength in coming to terms with her Amish upbringing, and having the courage to leave her known world, her family & friends behind...reaching for a better life for herself. I wish her nothing but the best, and hope that she will be happy in life and in her choices.

Having said that, I found the circumstances surrounding the 'love affair' between Irene & Ottie to be disturbing...the age difference, the fact that he had several marriages under his belt (in fact, was still married when he first starting 'courting' Irene), and just a strong sense of his taking advantage of Irene's innocence and naivete. Their relationship as described in the book left me feeling more than a little 'creeped out'...for lack of a better term.

Thanks, classicfox for sharing this one! I have Poobah1's mailing info, and will get this into the mail within the next few days.

Journal Entry 12 by wingdg7500wing at Bookring, A Bookring -- Controlled Releases on Saturday, May 15, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (5/17/2010 UTC) at Bookring, A Bookring -- Controlled Releases

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Passing this along to the next reader, poobah1.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To the finder of this book:

What you have in your hands is an honest-to-goodness gift, no strings attached. You may keep it forever and ever, pass it on to a friend, or release it back "into the wild" for someone else to find. I know it may seem a little odd to find this lying around--it's my way of touching the lives of others in a positive way, with the hope that it made your day. :)

If you are new to BookCrossing, and find this book and this site, welcome! Enjoy the site, the book, and hopefully the BookCrossing community. I hope you'll join BookCrossing (doesn't cost anything to join!) and if you do, please consider using any previous reader of this book ... or me, dg7500 ... as the member who referred you. Or you may remain anonymous!

If you are an old hand at BookCrossing, thanks for picking up the book! Either way, I hope you'll make a brief journal entry so all the previous and future readers can track this book's journey. Thanks, and Happy Crossing! :)

"Every book, every volume you see here, has a soul. The soul of the person who wrote it and of those who read it and lived and dreamed with it. Every time a book changes hands, every time someone runs his eyes down its pages, its spirit grows and strengthens ..."

Carlos Ruiz Zafon (The Shadow of the Wind)

Journal Entry 13 by Poobah1 from Lake Elmo, Minnesota USA on Friday, May 21, 2010
Arrived safely in the mail accompanied by a big, juicy hard cover straight off my wishlist! [Barbara Kingsolver's The Lacuna]. What a nice surprise, dg! You rock! Pushing to finish my book club pick for this month and then I'll get into this little gem. Thanks, CF, for including me on this ring. (You, of course, ROCK too!)

Journal Entry 14 by Poobah1 at Lake Elmo, Minnesota USA on Thursday, June 10, 2010
Just an update. I am sorry I haven't gotten to this book and kept it moving. I'm all tied up with a son graduating high school and all the shenanigans that go along with it. I haven't read a thing for over a month :-(

I'll PM the next one in line and perhaps I can be tacked on again at the end. Sorry for any delay. I just can't see hanging onto it any longer as I don't see a let up in sight until the beginning of July. Thanks for adding me CF. It does look good and hope to see it again some day.

Cheers,
Poobah1, Minnesota.

Journal Entry 15 by Poobah1 at -- BookRing, -- By post or by hand/ in person -- USA on Thursday, June 24, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (6/24/2010 UTC) at -- BookRing, -- By post or by hand/ in person -- USA

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Finally got this into the mail along to the next reader in line up. I'm so sorry for hanging onto it for so long. Life just got in the way with this one.


Cheers,
Poobah1 :^)

Books…Love ‘em and Leave ‘em.


Journal Entry 16 by oi-reader at Toledo, Ohio USA on Saturday, June 26, 2010
Arrived yesterday, plan on reading this weekend. Thanks for including me :)

Journal Entry 17 by oi-reader at Toledo, Ohio USA on Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Thanks for allowing me to participate.
I agree with previous readers, this is not what I was expecting.

Irene's tale could have been elaborated on so much more than it was. Having grown up near a Mennonite community I am familiar with some Amish/Mennonite culture and almost wonder if the book did not have more detail due to Irene being scared of possible repercussion. The numerous religious references also lead me to believe that Irene is scared of the life she has chosen.

And I agree, the relationship between Ottie and Irene creeped me out as well. He was actually quoted as saying "she married an old ...man, now she has to take care of him"????? and this was put into the book??? What kind of man takes a naive young woman with an 8th grade education away from her family and the only life she has known and demands she take care of him because he is unable to work? After that part of the book I was nauseated and felt horrible for Irene, wondering if she simply left one life of "slavery" for another.

I have lcila's address and will be sending this her way by the end of the week.

Journal Entry 18 by oi-reader at Toledo, Ohio USA on Friday, July 9, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (7/9/2010 UTC) at Toledo, Ohio USA

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Off to the next reader!

Journal Entry 19 by wingIcilawing at Nantes, Pays de la Loire France on Sunday, July 18, 2010
Tanks a lot for sending it to me. I'm looking forward to reading it.

Journal Entry 20 by wingIcilawing at Nantes, Pays de la Loire France on Sunday, August 8, 2010
I just finished the book and I liked it but after readind the previous entries I'm a bit confused.
I wasn't particulary shocked about the age difference and I think Ottie is a good and funny man who don't skin Irene.
I also thank that the book was about the amish way of life but it's more about the escape and Irene's feeling about it and the ban.

Thanks for sharing.

PMing sing-on-a-star

Journal Entry 21 by sing-on-a-star at Manchester, Greater Manchester United Kingdom on Saturday, September 4, 2010
Thanks Icila for sending it to me and thank you classicfox for organising the ring. I'm going to read right away!

Journal Entry 22 by sing-on-a-star at Manchester, Greater Manchester United Kingdom on Wednesday, September 8, 2010
I found this an interesting book, but I agree with previous readers that I would have liked to have found out more about Irene's upbringing in an Amish family, particularly as my knowledge of the community is negligable. I found some aspects of this book a self promotion for Irene and Ottie's love and new lives, as though they were trying to convince me that everything about the Amish way of life was wrong, and everything about their new life together is right. I also had a slight sense that Irene was trying to paint Ottie in an endearing light, which as her husband he is to her but I was uncomfortable with their relationship. people can't help who they fall in love with, but I wondered if it was Irene's naivity and upbringing that encouraged her to fall in love with an overweight, ill and much older man. I also wondered if Irene's dislike of the Amish way of life would have been strong enough for her to leave if Ottie had not come along. A simply written book which could have had much more complexity in the themes is explored. However worthwhile reading.

Have pm'd Azuki for her address and will send it on as soon as she replies.

Released 13 yrs ago (9/21/2010 UTC) at -- Controlled Release, -- By post or by hand/ in person -- United Kingdom

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Sending to azuki

Journal Entry 24 by wingAzukiwing at Miami, Florida USA on Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Looks like the book took a slow plane crossing over the Atlantic but crossed over it did.
Thanks so much to all for sharing and moving this book along!

ETA: 10/30 - 300dogs want to be skipped so I just pm'ed spoiledrotten, who's next.

Journal Entry 25 by wingAzukiwing at Miami, Florida USA on Monday, November 1, 2010
I don't mind the lack of background information about the Amish culture, as there are plenty out there to read should this one prompts anybody's interest. I find it interesting that she calls the religion a cult, as usually cult is viewed rather negatively, but generally speaking, most Americans have a positive, even romanticized, view of Amish. It reminds Americans of a gentler time, how their ancestors may have lived, and the virtues and family bonds that are highly cherished but mostly gone now.

Also, in all honesty, any caring parents, in any culture or period, will be upset if their sheltered, young daughter elopes with a man twice her age, thrice divorced, and living on disability pension. Not to mention that an honorable man would not have taken pictures of the Amish without permission, and, knowing well what reprucussion it would mean for an unmarried girl to have sex in her culture, would have held back, and waited till they are truly married to do so.

Well, I don't want to be too judgmental, and I do hope they are still happily married at this moment. But then who knows? Maybe Ottie's role is just the catalyst to bring Irene into the wider world.

I will mail this out tomorrow to spoiledrotten.

Journal Entry 26 by spoiledrotten at Waldwick, New Jersey USA on Friday, November 5, 2010
Received this in the mail today. Have one book in front of this. Thanks for sending and including me.

Journal Entry 27 by spoiledrotten at Waldwick, New Jersey USA on Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Very interesting story about a woman that leaves the Old Order Amish Community in which she has been raised. After leaving, she marries an Englishman and is banned. Thanks so much for including me and sending to me.

Journal Entry 28 by spoiledrotten at Springfield, Illinois USA on Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (11/23/2010 UTC) at Springfield, Illinois USA

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Sent off this morning to continue its journey.

Journal Entry 29 by collectorkerri at Springfield, Illinois USA on Sunday, November 28, 2010
Received in yesterday's mail. Will read as soon as I can.

Journal Entry 30 by collectorkerri at Springfield, Illinois USA on Tuesday, December 14, 2010
I have rather mixed feelings about this book. I was not one of the readers who felt Irene and Ottie's relationship was weird or creepy. True, he is quite a bit older than her, but that is true of many fine relationships in this world; you can't help when you were born. Like azuki, I too hope they are still happily married.

Like dabercro, though, I don't have any more insight than I had previously into the Amish lifestyle; I have met a few Amish, but never really talked with them about being Amish. So I think the book could have gone into more detail than it did.

Sending on to guinaveve, as I was unable to reach WeHomeschool.


Journal Entry 31 by guinaveve at Mason, Ohio USA on Thursday, December 16, 2010
I received this in the mail today. I will finish my current read and then start on this. It should only take a day or two for me to delve into it. I am on winter break from my job along with my kids who are also on break for school, and I plan to spend a lot of time reading.
PMing Aberpeter for an address to send this along to when I am done.

Journal Entry 32 by guinaveve at Mason, Ohio USA on Saturday, December 18, 2010
I thought this book was over- simplified. So much more could have been said about her childhood, her romance with Ottie, her reasons(other than Ottie) for wanting to leave her culture and way of life, and details about the new situations she faces after becoming "English." I thought the most in-depth look at the lives of those mentioned in the book were from the small excerpts of letters sent to Irene by friends and family which are at the beginning of each chapter.
While I don't have a problem with her relationship with Ottie due to his age or his personality, I did form some negative opinions about his personality. He seemed lazy and shady to me. But Irene seems to love him and enjoy the life she has made with him.
I have Aberpeter's address and will be sending this out soon.

Journal Entry 33 by guinaveve at on Thursday, December 23, 2010

Released 13 yrs ago (12/23/2010 UTC) at

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Enjoy!

Journal Entry 34 by Aberpeter at Kirkland, Washington USA on Saturday, January 1, 2011
arrived yesterday - will start reading soon.

Journal Entry 35 by Aberpeter at Kirkland, Washington USA on Thursday, January 6, 2011
An interesting insight into the Amish community and Irene's escape. Like other readers of this book, I am also to know more about Irene's life growing up Amish. From perusing the internet I came across Irene's website http://ruthirenegarrett.com/ She has another book called Born Amish which was written after this book that describes her life growing up in the Amish community.

I was also bothered by Irene and Ottie's relationship. I can see how their relationship works for them, Irene is raised in an environment where the women are submissive and are there to take care of their husband and children. Ottie needs someone to take care of him. In reading the book, Irene is full of excuses on why Ottie isn't working and only collects disability. The aspect that bothered me the most is that Ottie is taking advantage of Irene and she can't see that since she loves him and he isn't abusive like her father.

Will move the book on as soon as I have sarkiegirl's address

Journal Entry 36 by Aberpeter at Kirkland, Washington USA on Monday, January 10, 2011

Released 13 yrs ago (1/10/2011 UTC) at Kirkland, Washington USA

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I dropped the book off at the post office this morning.

Journal Entry 37 by sarkiegirl at La Quinta, California USA on Saturday, January 15, 2011
Sounds interesting. It's here! I have 2 ahead of it...hopefully I'll get to it quickly.

Journal Entry 38 by sarkiegirl at La Quinta, California USA on Friday, February 18, 2011
Hi! I am very slow this month!!! I had two to read before this, but I only finished one...I will have to send the second one on, but I wondered if I can keep this a bit longer, because I really want to read it...unfortunately, I can't get ahold of the person after me...is the name spelled correctly?
Either way, I'll try to read quickly until I hear from someone.
Thanks!

Journal Entry 39 by sarkiegirl at La Quinta, California USA on Saturday, March 5, 2011
This book was very intriguing. I read it in about two days. I am always interested in books about people who escape situations that are not healthy for them, especially since we are not allowed to know too many details about the amish.
Having said that, I agree with other readers about how I too would have liked to read more about her upbringing. That part is more interesting to me than what happened after she left. Though hearing about the letters from the family members were very telling. I was also bothered by the "relationship" that she left for. I was bugged about the details. I try not to be judgmental about age differences and such...but that was kind of ridiculous. I still thought that the book was interesting and I will definitely recommend it to others. Thank you so much for including me!
I have the address for the next reader. I will send it out as soon as I can!
Thanks!

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